Awal dari sebuah akhir

Kalian salah jika mengira bahwa setelah kejadian itu ,diriku begitu saja menyadari dan menerima diriku yang dapat menyukai tidak hanya laki-laki namun perempuan juga. Setelah kejadian itu aku masi orang yang sama dengan pandangan negatif terhadap lesbian bahkan cenderung jijik dan menganggap itu taboo, teman baiku Alexa malah mempunyai pikiran yang lebih terbuka tentang ini dari pada diriku.

Aku penyuka laki-laki,bahkan aku sudah tertarik pada laki-laki semenjak aku SD kelas 2, laki-laki itu bernama Reynard lalu kelas 5 SD, Brendan, ketika aku masuk SMP pun aku langsung tertarik pada kakak kelasku bernama Benny yang duduk dikls 3 SMA karena ia adalah seorang ketua OSIS yang gagah lalu Jeremy teman sekelas Benny yang mempunyai muka yang tampan namun tak terlalu tinggi namun yang membuat ku tertarik paling lama adalah Westley. Ia duduk di kelas SMA 1, laki-laki itu sangat menarik, baik, perhatian, sangat mahir dalam bermain basket dan tentu saja berkacamata. Aku menyukai laki-laki berkacamata karena mereka terlihat pintar, serius dan cool. Namun pada saat itu Westley sudah mempunyai pacar bernama Aurora, ia perempuan yang sederhana namun sangat ramah. Dilihat dari semua itu apakah aku terlihat tidak normal? Setelah mengetahui bahwa Tara adalah lesbian aku pun menjauh darinya, bahkan cenderung takut dan jijik padanya. Aku masih tak menyadari kelainan yang telah ada didalam perasaanku pada saat itu, aku sangat menentang penyuka sesama jenis. Bagiku itu salah, bagiku itu dosa, bagiku itu abnormal.

Hari-harikupun kembali berjalan seperti biasanya. Alexa teman baiku mengajaku bermain basket setiap pagi sebelum kelas dimulai dan siang hari setelah semua kelas selesai, ia yang membuatku jatuh cinta pada permainan itu. Waktupun berlalu dan sekarang aku duduk dikelas SMP 2, ketika itu ada seorang perempuan lagi bernama Helga, aku sudah mengetahuinya semenjak aku masuk ke sekolah ini karena dia mempunyai adik yang super menyebalkan dikelasku. Orang tua mereka agak aneh menurutku, mereka menamai 4 anak perempuan mereka Helga tapi mempunyai nama belakang yang berbeda-beda. Anak no 1, Helga Crisantie, Anak no 2 yang merupakan teman sekelasku bernama Helga Parisian, anak no 3 dan 4 tidak berada disekolah yang sama denganku. Helga Crisantie duduk dikelas SMA 2 IPA, ia perempuan tomboi yang galak dan sangat protektif pada adiknya, aku mulai mengenalnya karena ia sering bermain basket hingga sore disekolah, sama dengan diriku.

Aku tak pernah tertarik berbicara dengan dirinya karena ku anggap ia sama mengesalkanya dengan adiknya, tidak seharusnya ia membela adiknya terus seperti itu, kapan adiknya akan menjadi dewasa kalo diperlakukan seperti itu terus. Sampai suatu hari tinggal kami berdua dilapangan basket, aku tak kunjung dijemput juga oleh supirku. Lalu ia tiba-tiba bertanya "Bagaimana kamu bisa dekat dengan Tara?" Pertanyaan yang membuatku kaget dan tercekat . Aku bertatapan denganya sekian lama dibawah langit yang berwarna oranye lalu aku menjawab saja seadanya tapi ia terus bertanya dan mengajaku berbicara. Ntah bagaimana pembicaraan itupun terus berlanjut sampai supirku menjemput dan aku baru mengetahui ia sengaja menungguku sampai dijemput karena sebenarnya ia bisa pulang kapan saja karena ia membawa mobil sendiri ke sekolah. Aku pulang dengan rasa penasaran yang menjadi-jadi namun aku terlalu lelah untuk berpikir, dirikupun jatuh tertidur di bangku mobil kijangku yang nyaman dengan angin sejuk yang berasal dari air conditioner ,menyelamatkanku dari udara panas di kota Jakarta.

Kembali lagi..

Rasa penasaran itupun berlanjut. Aku mengenal dirinya pertama kali seminggu setelah pertandingan basket itu, ia ku minta untuk mengisi diary kecilku. Diary yang digilir untuk diisi banyak orang dengan bolpen warna warni dan kau isi biodata dan opini mu, aku rasa kalian pasti familiar dengan itu. Semenjak itu aku menjadi dekat denganya, ia menyayangi ku seperti seorang adik. Melengkapi keinginanku untuk dimanja dan mempunyai seorang kakak, ntah sejak kapan aku memiliki keinginan itu, mungkin semenjak aku merasa kosong dan kesepian. Diriku yang lugu tidak mengetahui bahwa perhatian yang ia berikan melebihi batas normal teman maupun kakak atau adik angkat. Kami mulai bertemu setiap pagi di kantin sebelum masuk sekolah, ia sering kali telat tapi aku tetap menunggunya sampai detik-detik terakhir dimana aku harus benar-benar masuk kelas bahkan kadang-kadang aku memaksakan diri untuk minta ijin ke toilet atau terlambat masuk kelas demi bertemu dengan dirinya maupun sebentar saja. Bukan itu saja rutinitas yang kami lakukan, kami juga bertukar surat tiap hari. Surat-surat yang permulaanya hanya berisi perhatian dan kegiatan sehari-hari lalu mulai dibumbui dengan kata sayang dan pujian-pujian kecil. Ada beberapa surat darinya yang dilipat berbentuk kotak dan aku berusaha mempelajari lipatan itu untuk membalasnya, aku tidak mahir dalam hal itu. Aku minta tolong teman baiku, Alexa untuk membantuku mengajariku. Ia tahu bahwa aku dekat dengan perempuan itu tapi dia tidak tahu hubungan itu menjurus ke dunia terlarang, jangankan dia aku pun tak sadar dan tak tahu bahwa apa yang dilakukanya padaku itu tidak pantas dilakukan seorang kakak angkat pada adik angkatnya.

Hubungan kamipun terus bertahap, ia mengajaku untuk main kerumahnya begitu juga ia menawarkan dirinya untuk berkunjung kerumahku. Kami mengunci diri dikamar dan yang kami lakukan dipermulaan hanya bercanda-canda dan berbincang-bincang lalu dia mulai memeluku dan sekali-kali meciumku dipipi atau dikening. Aku menyukai perhatianya, sentuhanya, perasaan disayang yang luar biasa hangat dan nyaman dan aku mengira semua itu wajar saja dilakukan oleh seorang kakak angkat. Aku benar-benar mengira ia adalah seorang kakak angkat yang dikirim untuku dari Tuhan untuk menemaniku walaupun kami berdua tidak terikat hubungan darah apapun.

Kesenangan itupun mulai buyar dengan timbulnya masalah-masalah kecil yang pelan-pelan pun menjadi besar dan menelanmu hidup-hidup. Dimulai dari orang tua ku yang mulai mencium keanehan hubungan ku dengan perempuan itu dan menyuruhku untuk mulai menjauhinya tapi aku menolak dengan keras karena aku sangat sayang padanya dan menyukai perhatianya. Perempuan itu juga begitu religius sehingga aku tidak dapat melihat ada yang salah denganya. Berikutnya adalah pertemuanku dengan adik-adik angkat nya yang lainya, Fanya dan Vanessa. Aku cepat akrab dengan Fanya, lain denganku Fanya sepertinya hanya benar-benar diperlakukan sebagai adik angkatnya, Fanya bahkan tak tahu bahwa perempuan itu mungkin penyuka sesama jenis. Vanessa adalah adik angkat kesayangan perempuan itu, Fanya dan tentu saja diriku iri padanya. Masalah itupun berkembang sampai pada suatu hari perempuan itu terpaksa mengumpulkan kami semua di sebuah restauran jepang di bale air untuk meluruskan masalah itu. Dipertemuan itu ia membawa seorang perempuan yang jauh lebih tua darinya bernama Rania. Mereka berdua sangat mesra bahkan Rania sering kali menyuapkan makanan ke mulut perempuan itu. Lagu utada hikaru-first love terus diputar berulang-ulang selama pertemuan itu seakan-akan mengiringi kemesraan mereka. Target iri hatikupun berubah. Di titik ini ketika orang tuaku sudah menegurku berkali-kali tentang perempuan itu aku baru mulai mencurigai bahwa perempuan itu adalah lesbian.

Aku ingat dulu perempuan itu pernah bercerita tentang kehidupanya dulu di Melbourne sebelum pindah kembali ke Jakarta. Ia pernah menginap di rumah temanya dan ketika sedang tertidur teman perempuanya itu mencium dirinya dan ia langsung bangun dan pulang kerumahnya. Lalu beberapa saat kemudian temanya itu datang kepadanya dan berkonsultasi denganya lalu bertobat tapi mengapa aku meragukan akhir cerita itu sekarang.

Orang tuaku tak henti-hentinya melarangku, sehingga aku harus diam-diam jika ingin bertemu dengan perempuan itu namun kembali lagi pada diriku yang selalu menurut pada orang tua, pada akhirnya aku pun menjauhi dirinya. Ya diriku pun menyerah dan mulai menjauhi perempuan itu, perempuan pertama yang memacu perasaanku terhadap sesama jenis. Perempuan itu bernama Tara.

Ketika semuanya dimulai...

Kisah hidupku berlanjut. Aku selalu mempunyai sakit hati terhadap ibuku sejak dulu. Aku selalu ingat ketika ia memukulku memakai sapu lidi ketika sedang mengajariku baca. Dia ibu yang baik namun ia sangat keras dan disiplin. Aku rasa sejak kecilpun arogansiku sudah cukup tinggi karena aku dilahirkan sebagai anak pertama maka itu aku selalu berpura-pura didepan sehingga tampak aku tidak mengeluarakan emosi apapun walaupun sebenarnya hatiku ini sangat sensitif. Bahkan ada yang menjulukiku ice princess karena menurutnya hati ku sebeku es.

Kekacauan hidup ku yang sebenarnya di mulai ketika aku masuk SMP 1. Pertamanya aku masi Freya yang sama, yang selalu dijuluki kartu mati oleh teman-teman nya karena tidak bisa diajak pergi bersenang-senang kemanapun. Freya anak rumahan yang penurut. Aku pertama kali melihat dirinya di lapangan basket sekolahku, ketika pada hari itu diadakan kompetisi basket antara murid-murid nasional dan internasional sekolahku. Ia memakai baju kuning sehingga terlihat mencolok dari kejauhan. Ia tidak terlalu tinggi ,berambut pendek kecoklatan dan memakai kacamata. Kata-kata yang pertama kali terlintas dalam pikiran ku adalah " Mengapa ada lelaki di lapangan basket itu? Bukanya sekarang jadwalnya pertandingan perempuan?" lalu yang terlintas dikepalaku berikutnya adalah betapa tampanya dia walaupun ia lebih pendek dariku tapi itu tidak menutupi daya tariknya sama sekali. Lalu kemudian kuketahui dia bukanlah seorang lelaki tapi seorang perempuan karena dipertandingan itulah aku bertanding melawan dirinya. Aku merupakan salah satu perwakilan dari nasional dan dia dari internasional. Pertandingan hari itu dimenangkan oleh international.

Semenjak hari itu timbul rasa penasaran dalam diriku terhadapnya.

The Love of My LIfe (Part 3)

December 31, 2004
7.40 PM
Brooke

We’re having a party! Marco was against it at first but he seems perfectly satisfied now. I didn’t exactly play fair: I brought it up in front of Jenny and she got all excited and then he couldn’t bear to disappoint her.

Yesterday Lenny and I went to the grocery store and brought everything we need including napkins with Happy New Year printed in gold with matching paper plates.

Marco looks up at me and says, “Darling, it’s almost show time. Go take your shower.” I glance at my watch and rush to the bathroom.

After all the rush, showering, dressing up and back into the kitchen to check everything up. I look at Marco and say, “Aren’t you going to change?”

“Yeah, sure. Help me pick some clothes, will you?” We walk into our bedroom.

“What do you want to wear?” I’m hunting through his drawers for clothes.

“Whatever. You choose.” Marco lies on the bed. “Come here, darl.”

I stop rifting to through the closet and says, “There is no.”

“Absolutely true. So let’s not waste our time talking.” His voice is quiet, sexy and almost seducing. I flip the lock on the door.
“You know darl, you are so mean. I just got dressed.”
“Shhh.” He holds out his arm to me and the phrase one last time just pops into my mind unbidden.

8.40 PM
Marco

It all goes so fast. The doorbell rings and suddenly the house is packed with our nearest and dearest, we have invited everyone who matter to us: Dad, Lenny, artist friends of Clare’s, library school friends of mine, even parents of Jenny’s parents.

10.45 PM
Brooke

The children have run around and eaten too much party food and now they are sleepy but cranky. Jenny and her friends are not so restrained. “Mommy.... you said we could stay up!” Jenny bleats.

“Sure kiddo. You don’t want to sleep for a while?”

“Nooooooo.” Jenny says.

Then I look around at the living room, which is filled with a small group of people trying to dance, in a variety of way. I realize Marco isn’t in the living room. Marco isn’t in the kitchen as well. Hmm I wondered where he is.

11.20 PM
Marco

It has become very warm in the house, and I need to cool off, so here I am sitting on the enclosed front porch. I have been here for almost an hour. I can hear people talking in the living room. The snow is falling thick and fast now, covering all the cars and bushes. It’s a beautiful night. I open the door between the porch and the living room looking for Brooke.

11.40 PM
Brooke

I found Marco is sitting by himself on the front porch, in the dark, watching it snow. I’ve hardly glanced out the window all day, and now I realize it’s been snowing for hours.
“Come inside,” I say. I am standing beside him and Marco puts his arm round my waist and leans his head on my hip.
“I wish we could just stop time now, “he says. I’m running my fingers through his hair. It’s stiffer and thicker than it used to be, before it went gray.
“Brooke, it’s time...” he says
“What? What do you mean by its time?” I panic.
“It’s... I’m...”
“My God.” I sit down, facing Marco. “Are you in pain? I’m calling the ambulance!” Marco squeezes my hands tightly, not letting me go. “The last minutes of my life, I want to spend it with you. Just you. The love of my life” I’m shivering in my thin dress. In the house people are laughing and dancing. He puts his arm around me, warming me.
“Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you let me invite all these people?” I don’t want to be angry at him but I am.
“I don’t exactly know Brooke; I just feel it coming very soon. I don’t want you to be alone after and I wanted to say goodbye to everyone. It’s been good; it was a good last hurrah...” We sit there silently for a while. The snow falls, silently. Then his nose start to bleed, I panic. I can’t believe this. Somehow I know it was coming but here it is and we are just sitting here, waiting...
“Brooke... Kiss me!” Marco says.
I am kissing Marco and I hear people screaming, “Ten, nine, eight!” I start crying and co says “Stop crying Brooke, please... Love you always...” and everyone screams, all together “Happy New Year!” Outside on the street someone sets of firecrackers. I sit on the floor, holding Marco. The love of my life.

The Love of My LIfe (Part 2)

December 27, 2004

Marco

I wake up early in the morning, so early that the bedroom is blue in the almost-dawn light. I lie in the bed, listening to Brooke’s deep breathing, listening to the intermittent noise of traffic on Ferntree Gully Road, crows calling to each other, the heater shutting off. My lungs start to ache again. I prop myself up on my pillows and find the bottle of pain killers on my bedside table. I take three, wash them down with cold water.

I slide back into blankets and turn onto my side. Brooke is sleeping face down, with her arms wrapped protectively around her head. Her hair is unseen under the covers. She reminds me of Jenny, they are both so look alike. I smile. The light is changing. Brooke stirs, turns toward me, onto her side. I study her face. There are few soft lines, at the corners of her eyes and mouth that are the merest implication of the beginnings of Brooke’s face in middle age. I will in no way see that face of hers, and I regret it bitterly, the face with which Brooke will go on without me, which will never be kissed by me, which will belong to a world that I won’t know, except as a memory to Brooke’s relegated at last to a explicit past. What will Brooke have when I am gone? How can I ever leave her alone?

I hear Jenny talking in her bed. “Teddy...” says Jenny. “Jenny, are you awake dear? It’s still early, go back to sleep.” Silence. “Daddy?” I watch Brooke, to see if she will wake up. She is still, asleep. “Daddy!” Jenny called again. Carefully I turn, extricate myself from the blanket and get up from the bed. I walk out of our bedroom, down to the hall and into Jenny’s room. She giggles when she sees me. I make a growling noise, and Jenny start laughing. She is sitting up in bed, in the middle of every stuffed animal she has. “Move over, Jen.” Jenny scoots aside and I sit beside her in the bed. She fussily arranges some of the dolls around me. I put my arm around her and lean back and she holds out Mr Teddy to me. “Daddy, he wants to eat chocolates.”

“It’s a little early for chocolates, Mr Teddy. How about some omelettes?”

“Mr Teddy doesn’t want that,” she announces. Jenny makes a face. She does it by squinching together her mouth and eyebrows and nose.

“Shhhh. Mama’s sleeping.”

“Okay,” Jenny whispers, loudly. “Mr Teddy wants cereal.” Brooke groans and starts to wake up in the other room.

“Honey stars?” I cajole. Jenny considers. “With chocolate milk?”

“Okay.”

Jenny climbs onto my back, and we make our way into the kitchen. Brooke is standing sleepily by the sink, watching coffee drip into the pot and then she look at us and smile. “What’s for breakfast, kiddo and of course my darling husband?” she says.

“Cereals!” Jenny screams.

“Mmm. What kind of cereals?

“Honey stars!!”

“Honey stars it is, yum.” Brooke gets out the chocolate milk and honey star cereals box. She sets them on the counter and looks at me. “How about you darling? Omelette?”

“If you’re making it, yeah.” I wonder at Brooke’s efficiency, moving around the kitchen as though she’s Julia Child, as though she’s been doing this for years. She’ll be okay without me, I think as I watch her, but I know that she will not. I watch Jenny waiting for Brooke finish making her breakfast, and I begin to think of Jenny at twelve, at sixteen, at twenty one. It is not nearly enough, yet. I am not done, yet. I want to be here. I want to see them, I want to hug them in my arms, I want to live!

“Daddy’s crying,” Jenny whispers to Brooke.

“That’s’ because of my terrible cooking.” Brooke tells her, and winks at me, and I have to force myself to laugh.

The Love of My LIfe (Part 1)

December 17, 2004
Brooke

I wake up in the middle of the night and Marco is gone. I panic. I sit up in bed. The possibilities crowd into my mind. He could be run over by truck or out in the dark. I try to calm myself down, nothings bad is happening to Marco, nothings bad... - I hear a sound, someone is crying. I think it’s Jenny, maybe Marco when to see what’s wrong with Jenny, so I get up and go into Jenny’s room, but Jenny is asleep, curled around Mr Teddy, her blanked thrown off the bed. I follow the sound down the hall and there, sitting on the living room floor, there is Marco, with his head on his hand. I feel relieve, at least he doesn’t tried to kill himself again.

I kneel besides him. “What’s wrong, darling?” I ask him.

Marco raises his face and I can see the shine of tears on his cheeks in the street light that comes in the windows. “The medication is useless,” he says.

I put my arms around him. “No it’s not darling,” I say softly.

Marco shakes his head. “It’s not working Brooke, you know it’s not.” he says. We sit on the floor silence. It’s the third break down this month. Everything was perfect for us until Marco got lung cancer. Finally Marco says, “I’m dying Brooke.” I am about to argue when I realize that Jenny is standing near the living room couch. She’s wearing a blue polka dot nightgown and yellow duck slippers. Jenny squints and yawns in the harsh light of the kitchen. “Mmmmmorning,” Jenny says.

“It’s not really morning, kiddo,” I tell her. I get up and pick Jenny up. She’s so heavy now. I carry her down to the hall and throw her onto the bed and she screams with laughter. The clocks on her bedside table says 3:17 a.m. “See?” I show her. “You have to go back to sleep Jenny.” After sometime singing her favourite lullaby Jenny finally fall back to sleep and I walk back to the living room. Marco has managed to calm his self down and sit on the couch. I sit down beside him. It’s unpleasantly cold in here.

“Brooke.”

“Mmm?”

“When I’m gone-“Marco stops, look away, take a deep breath and begins again. “I’ve prepared everything, I mean I’ve been getting everything organized, all the documents, you know, my will, and letters to people, and stuff for Jenny, it’s all in my desk.” I can’t say anything. Marco looks at me. I open my mouth to say something but then my heart is suffering in pain, hearing the man I love talking about his dead.

First day

This is the first day I decided to write a blog. Aku sudah mencoba meunulis beberapa blog sebelumnya tapi akhiranya saya slalu menghapusnya.. Ntah mengapa.. Mungkin rasa tak puas atau rasa malu yang muncul tiba-tiba.

Aku Freya, seorang gadis biasa yang sekarang ini sedang melanjutkan kuliah diluar negeri. Disinilah aku memilih untuk mencurahkan kisah hidupku, yang menurut kata salah satu seorang temanku dapat dimuat dalam 7 novel berseri. Mungkin dia hanya hiperbola saja.

Kisahku dimulai dengan masa kecilku yang tidak bisa dibilang suram tapi ntah mengapa penuh kepahitan yang mungkin juga karena salah diriku sendiri yang tak mampu menyuarakan isi hati ku sendiri.

Aku adalah seorang anak pendeta lumayan terkemuka di salah satu kota besar di Indonesia. Sejak kecil aku terbiasa untuk bersikap baik dan manis didepan semua orang. Aku terkenal tidak banyak bicara dan selalu menurut. Anak yang tidak pernah menyusahkan, ayahku slalu berkata seperti itu. Tapi dia salah karena didalam hati ini sekian banyak hal yang ingin aku teriakan tapi lidahku kelu tak sanggup berkata-kata.

Ayahku adahalah ayah yang sangat baik namun ketika aku berada di SD ia sangat protektif padaku. Ia tak mengijinkan aku untuk mendengar lagu dunia, jalan-jalan ke mall bersama teman-temanku dan keluarga kami pada saat itu kurang mampu sedangkan mereka selalu bergaul dengan orang-orang kelas atas dan anak-anak mereka sudah mempunyai dan memakai gadget-gadget atau barang-barang merek terkini dengan harga yang menjulang. Aku tak menunjukan sikap apapun pada orang tuaku, aku hanya diam dan menekankan pada diriku bahwa aku mengerti.

Ketika adiku lahir, aku sangat senang. Tapi itu membuat kepribadian ku menjadi lebih keras lagi. Aku berusaha melindungi dia supaya dia tidak menjadi seperti aku menderita didalam. Aku berusaha agar dia tidak mengalami apa yang aku alami.

Smua alasan itulah yang menjadikan diriku Freya yang keras, realistis, protektif dan independent. Atas smua alasan itu pulalah cerita hidupku pun berawal.

'Life isn't meant to be easy' -Malcolm Fraser-

The Mysterious Smile

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It was only four o’clock in the morning. The sun was setting; the bedroom becomes indistinct in the shadow. I closed my eyes, waited for sleep. After sometime I understood that I would not sleep; my mind start to wander around.

Austin is an ordinary white collar guy with amazingly beautiful aura, pale skin colour, tall posture, with a thick black hair and he has the most mysterious charming smile according to Vienne. Austin and Luna, his wife moved to the apartment next to her a month ago. Luna on the other side is a skinny, chubby young woman with a successful carrier at the most famous bank in the country. I always had seen her complaining to her husband about everything, seriously everything.

“Ahhh... What a waste.. If Austin is my husband it wouldn’t have anything to complain about, his black collar eyes, his mysterious smile...” Vienne’s have been in love with Austin since the first day moved to the apartment next to her.

Vienne hate living in apartments, this is one of the reason. She can hear clearly what her neighbour talking about if they speak just a little bit louder. No privacy at all and the main reason is its disturbing her sleep. One night, she was awaked by a loud noise from the young couple who just moved to an apartment next to her, they keep arguing about the same thing over and over again. It makes her feel sick.

Vienne finally feel fed up, she jump out from her bed, mumbling. “It’s four o’clock in the morning for God sake! Can they let me sleep peacefully for at least for another couple hour?” And decided to knock on their door.

“I want to have a baby but not right now! Don’t you understand that Chris?” scream Luna terrified, when Austin heard the door knocking. “Arghh! It must be our neighbour. Why did you have to scream so loud? Can we talk nicely?”

He walks to the door and open it. “Me n my wife are deeply sorry, we must have disturb your sleep again.” He said with a sincere voice. Vienne can’t say a thing. His mysterious smile melts her down. “Why all the good men, has to be married?” Grunt Vienne deep inside her heart. “Hello? Vienne? Are you ok?” said Austin, his hand waving in front of her face. “I’m okay, and please keep the voice down” she said as cool as she can and turned around.

Back to her room, she feel exactly like one of those dreams in which you suddenly realize that you have a test you haven’t studied for and you aren’t wearing any clothes. And you left your wallet at home. “Damn, did he notice I was staring at him?”

“Austin!!! Can you please try to understand my situation???” scream Luna. Snap back to reality, Vienne felt horribly guilty for her feelings towards Austin, but what makes her terribly guilty she slept with Austin last night.

“But, it’s not my fault if Austin fall in love with me too right? “defending herself.

Another loud noise come from Austin’s apartment, it sounds like someone throw a cup, a glass or anything that could break to the floor. Vienne’s started to worried. Is it Luna? “ Silent for a couple of minutes feels like hell to her and then she heard another shouting.

“You cheated on me, do you???” Luna terrified.

“Oh No!!! How did she find out??” Vienne’s began to panic, she jump out of her bed and start to walk around the room, thinking and still waiting for Austin to reply Luna.

“Answer me!!!” Luna screams again.

“Lie Austin, just lied to her!” begged Vienne. She really loves Austin and doesn’t want him to hurt at all.

“Darling please slow down yout voice a bit!” Austin finally say a word.

“How dare you told me to slow down my voice?”and then another glass shattered sound followed by terribly noisy voice. It sound like an earthquake just happen in that apartement.

What happen? What happen? She wanders. Should I knock their door? Should I check them out? What if my darling Austin hurt? And then she decided to knock their door but no one answer.

“Austin? Luna? Are you guys okay?” whispered Vienne slowly. The door suddenly open. It’s Austin, Vienne’s heart jump in happiness.

“Hai Vienne...” He smile mysteriously with blood dripping on his lips. Vienne started to feel afraid

“What have happen Austin?”

“Don’t you love me Vienne? Finally we can be together. I love you”

She’s afraid, she want to scream but her body feels numb and Austin mysterious smile seems hypnotizing her, pulling her towards him. She knows something is wrong but she can’t resist his smile. She walk in to the room and she saw Luna’s dead body with blood all over her neck and the door closed, that’s the last thing she saw before cold hands pull her neck to the ground.

PS: This is just a story I made